Blablabla

So many days have passed since I decided to write an entry here once again. School schedule has been very hectic recently. We have so many projects to accomplish and so many deadlines to meet. I promised myself thatI would not cram anymore, theres a problem though, there is this unidentified thing that hinders me from avoiding the habit you know?

I guess it is probably because of what is happening to me recently. I have learned so many things fromthe past few days of my existence.

Things ALWAYS happens for a reason. Probably one of the reasons why I am experiencing "hard- life situation right now and the reason why I can't seem to find the right path to road I'm passing is because, perhaps, I seldom communicate with God through prayer. the arguement I had with my dad, that certain gesture thatsignifies something which is not "right" and the times where in I can't concentrate with schoolworks are the factors that became opened my eyes. It is my "AWAKENING MOMENT". God is calling me and reminding me that I am becoming distant from him once more.

I thought that this day would turn out right. I guess I when I realized I woke at the wrong side of the bed this morning. I thought this nightmare would not haunt me down anymore, but it still clings on me, not just in my mind, but also,in my heart, and in my soul as well.

I can't tell you exactly what these are because I rather keep things in private. Oh! What has gotten into me this past few days? Is this because of STRESS? TOO MUCH WORK? TOO MUCH SCHOOL WORK?

Waah. I must avoid these circumstances. I must avoid PARANOID-ism. OHMYF**KINGGOODNESS!

I am getting interested in Noli Me Tangere nowadays. I even remember Miss Aniago telling us, that the anxieties and worries that are bottled up inside us are the ones that make our body sick,physically and literally.

Worrying about my worries makes me worry more because of what might happen to me. Waaah. What would cause my sickness? Will I die at an early age? Hahahaha

SPEAKING OF DEATH...

Every night, before I cry myself to sleep, I imagined what would.. uhh life(?) be like when we DIE. That question really intrigues me right now. The only way on how I can solve the puzzle of this mystery is TO DIE of course, but I guess, Im not yet ready. I wonder how those dead souls feel lurking around the globe, doing there unfinish business, flying and floating and even passing through SOLID OBJECTS. Those objects whose molecules are COMPACT. Hahaha. (AM I TALKING SCIENCE HERE?) Oh COMMON. Hahahaha.

I'm sorry for this useless entry for my mind right now, is experiencing technical difficulties. My nervous system is breaking down, My eyes are swollen and my knees are shaking baby. Hahahaha

Events that probably change my life from the pastfew days are

The Entrep Practimcum, selling, selling, AND YES.. earning MONEY of course. (TALK ABOUT MATERIALISM) TSSSS. :)

CAREER AWARENESS TALK.

Once again, it confused me more. Charie Kay and I even made a list of blurry future. YES. my BLURRY future.

WHAT ELSE

Watching JUST LIKE HEAVEN and MEMOIRS of GEISHA.
Looking forward to watching BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN.
Fighting for my belief. Yeah. The one my dad and I had argued about a while back.

He told me to throw away my broken mirror for it brings bad luck, according to the Chinese. He got mad at me for telling him that I ain't Chinese and I dont believe in those kinds of stuff.

I DONT WANNA BELIEVE IN THOSE KINDS OF STUFF. It is REALLY STUPID. Well, Im not saying that Chinese are stupid, but the fact that BELIEVING to those kinds of superstition seems pointless to me.

I broke my mirror once,

DID I EXPERIENCE MY SEVEN YEARS OF BAD LUCK.

If i did, I would not probably be alive right now. I would not probably be studying in a school with good education. I would not have good friends who are always there. I would not have overprotective but caring parents who knows what is good and right for me. I never would have met.. that certain someone that TOUCHED my life, and changed my life, who inspired me not only with the works that that person is giving us, but also, in dealing with life, being an instrument and inspiration to others as well and being the GOOD PERSON that God wants us to be. Hahahaha.

Writing the thoughts I have in mind, makes me feel betttaaah. I guess blurting out my feelings to others is another therapy for me to be cool, calm and to bring my mind back where it actually belongs.

HUWAAT?